FlexiLingoIn one line
Pardonfor bumping into someone,Excusez-moifor interrupting, andJe suis désoléfor when you have actually done something.
Phrases
Thanking — in order of warmth
| French | Pronunciation | English | Strength |
|---|---|---|---|
Merci | /mɛʁ.si/ | thanks | basic |
Merci bien | /mɛʁ.si bjɛ̃/ | thanks | neutral |
Merci beaucoup | /mɛʁ.si bo.ku/ | thank you very much | warm |
Merci infiniment | /ɛ̃.fi.ni.mɑ̃/ | thank you so much | very warm |
Je vous remercie | /ʒə vu ʁə.mɛʁ.si/ | I thank you | formal |
Je vous remercie sincèrement | /ʒə vu ʁə.mɛʁ.si sɛ̃.sɛʁ.mɑ̃/ | my sincere thanks | formal and warm |
C'est très gentil de votre part. | /sɛ tʁɛ ʒɑ̃.ti də votʁ paʁ/ | that's very kind of you | kind |
Je ne sais pas comment vous remercier. | /ʒə nə sɛ pa kɔ.mɑ̃ vu ʁə.mɛʁ.sje/ | I don't know how to thank you | very strong |
Merci pour tout. | /mɛʁ.si puʁ tu/ | thanks for everything |
Thanking for what
| Structure | Example |
|---|---|
merci pour + noun | Merci pour ton aide. /mɛʁ.si puʁ tɔ̃.n‿ɛd/ |
merci de + infinitive | Merci d'être venu. /mɛʁ.si dɛtʁ və.ny/ |
merci de + noun (formal) | Merci de votre attention. /mɛʁ.si də votʁ a.tɑ̃.sjɔ̃/ |
merci pourwith a noun andmerci dewith an infinitive. Both are seen with nouns, butpouris more natural.Note that
merci detakes an infinitive where English uses "-ing": "thanks for coming" becomesMerci d'être venu— and a past infinitive at that, because the coming is already done.
Replying to thanks
| French | Pronunciation | English | Register |
|---|---|---|---|
De rien. | /də ʁjɛ̃/ | you're welcome | neutral |
Je vous en prie. | /ʒə vu.z‿ɑ̃ pʁi/ | you're welcome | formal |
Je t'en prie. | /ʒə tɑ̃ pʁi/ | you're welcome | informal |
Il n'y a pas de quoi. | /il nja pa də kwa/ | don't mention it | neutral |
Pas de problème. | /pa də pʁɔ.blɛm/ | no problem | informal |
Avec plaisir. | /a.vɛk plɛ.ziʁ/ | my pleasure | warm |
C'est normal. | /sɛ nɔʁ.mal/ | it was nothing | informal |
De rien, c'est tout naturel. | /də ʁjɛ̃ sɛ tu na.ty.ʁɛl/ | not at all | warm |
French replies to thanks far more consistently than English does. In English "thanks" often gets a nod or nothing; in French
De rienorJe vous en prieis expected, and saying nothing reads as cold.
Apologising — three levels
| French | When | Pronunciation |
|---|---|---|
Pardon | bumping into someone, squeezing past, not hearing | /paʁ.dɔ̃/ |
Excusez-moi | interrupting, asking a question, disturbing | /ɛks.ky.ze mwa/ |
Je suis désolé(e) | you have actually done something | /ʒə sɥi de.zo.le/ |
| French | Pronunciation | English |
|---|---|---|
Je suis vraiment désolé(e). | /ʒə sɥi vʁɛ.mɑ̃ de.zo.le/ | I'm really sorry |
Je m'excuse | /ʒə mɛks.kyz/ | not correct in formal French |
Toutes mes excuses. | /tut mez ɛks.kyz/ | my apologies |
Veuillez m'excuser. | /vœ.je mɛks.ky.ze/ | please excuse me — formal |
Je vous prie de m'excuser. | /ʒə vu pʁi də mɛks.ky.ze/ | very formal |
C'est ma faute. | /sɛ ma fot/ | it's my fault |
Je ne l'ai pas fait exprès. | /ʒə nə le pa fɛt ɛks.pʁɛ/ | I didn't do it on purpose |
Désolé du retard. | /de.zo.le dy ʁə.taʁ/ | sorry I'm late |
Désolé de vous déranger. | /de.zo.le də vu de.ʁɑ̃.ʒe/ | sorry to bother you |
English uses "sorry" for all three of these and French does not. "Sorry" when you bump into someone, "sorry" when you interrupt, "sorry" when you break something. French splits them, and using
Je suis désoléfor a small bump sounds oddly heavy — like saying "I deeply regret" when you meant "excuse me".The mapping:
Pardon= "sorry" as a reflex ·Excusez-moi= "excuse me" ·Je suis désolé= "I'm sorry".
Replying to an apology
| French | Pronunciation | English |
|---|---|---|
Ce n'est pas grave. | /sə nɛ pa ɡʁav/ | it's fine |
Ce n'est rien. | /sə nɛ ʁjɛ̃/ | it's nothing |
Pas de problème. | /pa də pʁɔ.blɛm/ | no problem |
Ne vous inquiétez pas. | /nə vuz ɛ̃.kje.te pa/ | don't worry |
Ça arrive. | /sa a.ʁiv/ | these things happen |
Je comprends. | /ʒə kɔ̃.pʁɑ̃/ | I understand |
Sympathy
| French | Pronunciation | English |
|---|---|---|
Je suis désolé(e) pour toi. | /ʒə sɥi de.zo.le puʁ twa/ | I'm sorry for you |
Je suis de tout cœur avec toi. | /ʒə sɥi də tu kœʁ a.vɛk twa/ | my thoughts are with you |
Toutes mes condoléances. | /tut me kɔ̃.do.le.ɑ̃s/ | my condolences |
Courage ! | /ku.ʁaʒ/ | hang in there |
Ça va aller. | /sa va a.le/ | it'll be all right |
désolé — with de or pour
| Structure | Example |
|---|---|
désolé de + infinitive | Désolé d'être en retard. /de.zo.le dɛtʁ ɑ̃ ʁə.taʁ/ |
désolé pour + noun | Désolé pour le retard. /de.zo.le puʁ lə ʁə.taʁ/ |
désolé que /de.zo.le kə/ + subjunctive | Désolé que tu sois malade. /de.zo.le kə ty swa ma.lad/ |
Traps
| Trap | Explanation |
|---|---|
Do not use Je m'excuse | Literally "I excuse myself". Excusez-moi is correct. |
Pardon for a light bump | For a real mistake, Je suis désolé. |
merci de + infinitive, merci pour + noun | |
désolé agrees | désolé for a man, désolée for a woman. |
Je suis désolé is an apology, not sympathy | For sympathy, désolé pour toi. |
De rien answers thanks | Not an apology. |
Merci alone can mean no | When offered something — see accepter-refuser. |
That last one is worth knowing before you need it. Offered more wine, a plain
Merciwith a small hand gesture means "no, thank you". To accept, sayOui, merciorVolontiers. English "thanks" in the same situation would be read as acceptance; French reads it as a polite refusal.
Why Je m'excuse is wrong
a grammatical argument that hardened into a rule
s'excuser is a reflexive verb — the action is done to the subject.
So Je m'excuse literally means "I excuse myself" — which is odd, since excusing is the other person's job.
The correct form asks the other person for forgiveness:
| ✅ | Meaning |
|---|---|
Excusez-moi. | excuse me |
Veuillez m'excuser. | please excuse me |
Je vous prie de m'excuser. | I beg you to excuse me |
Je suis désolé(e). | I'm sorry — an adjective, not a verb |
In practice Je m'excuse is heard in French speech — and in Quebec it is entirely normal.
But in France, in formal situations and in exams, it counts as an error.
The practical rule: use Excusez-moi as your default. It is never wrong in any situation.
And a useful subtlety:
| Meaning | Pronunciation | |
|---|---|---|
Excusez-moi | before the intrusion — "may I" | /ɛks.ky.ze mwa/ |
Je suis désolé | after the mistake — "I'm sorry" | /ʒə sɥi de.zo.le/ |
Excusez-moi, vous avez l'heure ?— beforeJe suis désolé, j'ai cassé votre verre.— after
English draws exactly this line — "excuse me" before, "I'm sorry" after — so this one needs no learning at all. Just remember that French adds a third, lighter word, Pardon, for the reflex bump.